Monday, April 27, 2009

Toying With Designs


I liked the images that I found related to the last post so much, I played around with them and turned one into a pattern. It's been my ambition for awhile to find a picture (preferably from archive.org, but perhaps not) and turn it into a pattern to print on fabric. Then I'd like to make it into a skirt.

My sewing skills are pretty bad. I'm getting better, but it doesn't come naturally to me. Also my sewing machine came from the garbage :)
This is what i have so far. It seemed to need something more, so I added a dot in the middle. Also, making it only two per pattern allows me to print it on standard paper at a higher resolution. I'm working on another cat one now.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Porno Comedy Show


I read about this night on BlogTo, and by the end I was sad to learn that it would be the last one of its kind. It was a blast.
The premise: the internet has killed the porn industry. The video store is closing its porno basement and selling everything off for 5 bucks. Come see a sexy comedy show and perhaps take home a souvenir.
I enjoyed every act.


The whole room was pink-tinted. We ended up near the bj section, just behind the gay pr0n area. The bum stuff was on our right. Strangely, it managed to not be that awkward. But I have to admit, that when I picked up the movie on the top row, far left, I covered the penis on the cover before reading the info. I didn't even realize that I did it.

All the comedy was sex-themed. I am clueless enough that this was not obvious to me. One of the first acts w
as a girl group, sort of a musical acting comedy troupe. When they walked on stage chanting about 'yoni power' I knew I was going to love them. They need to come up with a long-form of their act and turn it into a 'Best in Show' type movie. They did some great bits about their first sexual experience, complete with chanting in unison and grand, wavy vaginal gestures. Good girls!
I didn't get a picture of all of the pe
rformers, but the opener was great as well. She was incredibly crass, and made a great joke about preferring the taste of vegetarians.
Next up was Jimmy Hogg, who I imagined would be a 200lb trucker. Instead he was a musical brit who sang about his platonic love for children. The sentiment I remember liking most was
'We'll play a g
ame and the winner gets ice cream. Unless I win, and then we'll both get ice cream, but I won't win, I'll let you win. But I won't let you know that I let you win'. I yelled something while he was on stage, instinctively tried to contribute to his joke (yes, it's possible to forget that comedians really don't like it when you do that) but he took it in stride.
The most memorable acts of the evening came at the end. First, a woman with her 'dance partner' Gerard - A dummy with her hand under it. She did an incredible job of using her right hand to seduce herself, and ended up getting herself drunk and passing out 'in his arms' (after showing a fair bit of garter-clad thigh).
The grand finale - the adorable and hilarious host did a dance to what he proclaimed to be his 'coming out' song from the nineties - the most glorious of dance tracks, 'I'm gonna get you' by Bizarre Inc. He did this dance in shorts, totally balls-out.
Combined with drinks with Deb, a stellar night.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Is there any better reason to be full of joy

Than the sight of cats jumping through hoops?
This is a shot in the Inle Lake Monastary in Burma-Myanmar, where they train cats to jump through hoops. Let's go?


Sunday, April 19, 2009

Eating for two?


No, not that kind of eating for two. I ordered from New Generation Sushi after a long day of disassembling furniture, cleaning and moving mattresses in preparation for the new roommate. When I got my order home, I noticed that it had two pair of chopsticks in the bag. They must have assumed that due to the volume of food I ordered, I must be two people.
All of this home preparation is strange and new for me. Up until now, no one else here gave a crap about the apartment, and I was the last one in. I wasn't about to take responsibility for making the place look better or keeping it super tidy if I was going to be doing it all alone.
But now that I'm the senior roommate (wtf...am I in goddamned college or something) I feel more of a sense of responsibility for the place. Now I do things like buy tablecloths and clean baseboards instead of wake up hungover and crawl to brunch.
On a related note, I got very down after going out with people from my faculty. Not only was I terrible at making conversation, but I found only one or two of them remotely interesting or friendly. I biked home drunk, huffing and puffing and feeling like a big boner.
Should've gone to a movie instead.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Grownups Read Things they Wrote as Kids


Lives Here.
What a wonderful night.

Who'd have known little you would be so hilarious, seemingly without effort.
Have a look at the most tender, naive, selfish, unadulterated part of yourself by looking at your childhood writings.
Some of the readers seemed to treat the evening as a sort of therapy. Others laughed at their young selves and played to the audience. Each presented a slightly painful, completely deluded and understandable view of reality. One more memorable moment-two versions of a young girl's autobiography, written two years apart. In the first "the most important person in my life...is my mother"
in the second
"the most useful person in my life is my mother"
I'd love to contribute next time...off to my mother's house to dig up some 'treasure'