Leggo

How cliche are symbolic gestures? They're so much a part of our culture, they've become so tired that any personal meaning they might have had has been sapped.

I've found myself too often lately dwelling on resentments and unresolved feelings from my recent past. The problem with these kind of feelings, for me, is that time doesn't necessarily make them easier to handle or duller.
It sometimes takes me a very long time to process things-that's a problem I have.
It seems that I find events too complicated or to dangerous to process and my mind holds onto them for later. Either that, or I look back on them with new eyes as I grow and change.

I'm not an unlucky or an unhappy person. Just the opposite, I feel better about my life than I have in a long time. I'm stimulated by work and school, and have a partner who I love and am very proud of. A domestic but generally happy life, and the best I can do for right now.
I wish I could pack up all of the things that I feel resentment, hurt, and anger for and throw them into the sea or crush them like a car in a wrecking yard. Appropriately, every earthly analogy I can think of for what to do with how I feel highlights the fact that these feelings don't actually go away.
I started this post thinking that I could compose an exorcism, but now I'm not so sure.